My status

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Gaining Ground

You know sometimes when you travel, you think about the long road ahead, the inherent frustrations of the journey itself, and this makes you question the significance of the entire process. Most of the time, I admit, I feel remotely pessimistic about my own path and where this caravan of life is taking me.

Alas, there is a breaking point for me so far in 2012. I feel calmer, perhaps due to the fact that I am chronologically getting older, and just perhaps a tad bit wiser, but outside of those two imponderables, I finally feel that I am gaining ground in my walk. I sense the purpose of my step, perhaps the mortality in my veins in a more lucid light, but I am truly shedding my skin this year and it feels cathartic & hopeful.

Perhaps, my butterfly will finally emerge victoriously from this tired, aged & nearly broken chrysalis that has been my life for the last 20 years or so. I have to find a way to unleash my true purpose herein and cease my idling and I believe in earnest this is the year of that rebirth.

I cannot vividly recall a moment in time that felt so aligned with my own vision of my walk and my soul so prepared to be unmasked. Truth be known, I have felt shrouded from the light, content to survive inconspicuously in the darkness, never realizing that for true growth to occur, you need both sides of the proverbial coin ---- the yin and yang of life and the elements of God need to shower & nourish equally. Water without sunlight will not yield a good harvest.

Too long I have remained in the darkness, meditating, believing and seeking its truth, but now I need to allow God to enrich the fertile ground of my life in His glorious light, the light that needs no shadow, no shade & no allowance for abdicating my fears. It is time to position myself towards the greatness that God has intended.

Feeling a comforting warmth in my soul, I know this year will be uniquely special and if it is the end of all time, then so be it likewise, my Mayan friends.... at least, I will go out with a glorious bang of enthusiasm and contentment in my soul. I don't fear dying at this juncture, only not truly living.....