My status

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Growing up.......

Yesterday was my birthday and I don't feel much older than I did let's say last Monday (grin), but I guess my life is moving me closer to my final walk down the seashore...waiting patiently for Charon to guide me across the river Archeron. :P
(What a grand event to behold!)

I do have slightly more aches and pains than I did even a few months ago, but that is probably just due to my inactivity and lack of time in the gym. I am going to join either Anytime or Snap (both 24/7 gyms in Mandeville) and use them in the evenings or mornings....shooting for a solid 3 days...heck all I need is a good eliptical machine, a smith machine and a nice selection of free weights and I am set!
I have never been comfortable in a large gym setting...prefering the focus and intensity that I get from quiet, private training. Many of the gyms have become so "active" that it is a more of a outing or a adult club than a workout facility. After-hour events, beer/wine, concerts, speed dating and cooking classes....what is all of this? Are we here to pickup people or weights?


In any case, feeling a little blah this week. Closing on the house next Monday (2/25)
and feel good about it...not about the $$$$ of moving and furnishing a larger home, but it comes with the plans I guess..... :)

Oh yeah....Had a nice birthday, cake with candles, shrimp pesto pasta...yummy.
All prepared for me for a nice change of pace. The cards from my children in the was an amazing day. Simple, yet meaningful.

This week --- almost done. Life is good.

Monday, February 18, 2008

My kids...

After my divorce, my children moved to Charlotte, NC. It has been a few years, but we try to see each other just as often as we possibly can. It is a long way from New Orleans, but I have always tried to make it work and let them know just how amazing they truly are. Sometimes, just a memory or a glimpse of a child walking with their dad makes me get a little sad inside...and I have my moments of guilt and reflection, but I know I am a great dad. I know first hand that it is better to be from a broken home, than live in one. Now, our memories are rich, colorful and full of joy....not the struggles, sadness or pain of being in a bad marriage.

I miss them with all my heart each day. Perhaps that has always made me a more difficult person to know and love...perhaps that has made me more jaded and less trusting of my path, perhaps it has simply made me a stronger, independent soul. I know that my path is right and my children are a blessing to me, no matter where the sun sets any given day, their light always shines in my heart.


Thursday, February 14, 2008

Moving & Valentine's Fun....

What's the next logical step to make after selling my home in Hammond?
Well, closing on a new home later this month, of course! It is in Mandeville and on the water and should be a lot better place for entertaining, having fun, drinking some good cheap wine (grin) and just enjoying life.

I don't quite get all of the Valentine's Day hype. Compelled by guilt, streams of ordinary men shuffle into their nearest 24hr drug store and peer impatiently over the sea of red (overpriced) cardboard icons of true love and herd out to deliver these gifts to their esteemed partners. Add a box of chocolate, a dozen roses and you have the perfect compilation of nausea --- that is still so appealing to most women. I think it all about control and guilt. (and whipped men) I think you love someone all of the time, all days of the year, not ones when you need to demonstrate your affection through careless gestures of prepackaged enthusiasm. (oh how grand!)
I am not saying that celebrating your bond of love is a bad thing, just don't require men to do out of pure compulsion...for only 1 day of the year.......

Ahhhh, the jadedness? the joy and the laughter......... :P
Wonder if a big box of chocolate would get me even further out of the dog house?
I wonder if the dog died of Theobromine poisoning b/c of all of the chocolate?
I wonder if I would feel different if I had grown the cacao plant myself?
Would it still be a gift or a legitimate homage????

Hey, how about a walk on the levee??????
just keep smiling and turn LEFT... LOL

I miss the simplicity and magic.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Last Parade - Trading your moments.

After all day Sunday of standing on metal stands watching and waiting for one parade Krewe after another, I finally got my last fill of parades. Visiting with my family and friends was enjoyable, but the certain misery of dealing with immature adults, jockeying for front row positions, & just being outside waiting...and watching nearly a whole day of my life get traded for a handful of colorful plastic beads, just didn't make sense. Probably just getting old some would say, others might say it was getting wiser! (or more careful of what I trade the moments of my life for)

I grew up on a major parade route, so I have many memories of chasing floats and enjoying the youthful joy of being mesmerized by the large magical parade floats since I was about 2 years old. It was an amazing joy in my life that I had attempted on a few occassions to transend into my adulthood, but it just never was the same. I have ridden several times in a some major Krewes and it is an amazing experience. When riding on the floats, you are the players, and not part of the crowd, the dictate the flow and the fun and from your seat every brief sighting of happy faces on the parade route is pure bliss. You don't witness the cussing, the jealous drunken brawls, nor the pushing and the bad attitudes. You don't always observe the drunken boyfriend and his bimbo shoving a little kid out of the way so that two grown, slightly enebreated adults can grab their fair share of plastic trinkets...and maybe for a brief moment this 38 year old girl can recapture her lost days of when she was 21 and maybe didn't have to try so hard. Fights, cussing, oh what fun...all over plastic beads, remind me this is something more, right?

I too am tired of trying so hard to realize that watching parades is a fun pastime and not just waste of time, a waste of nearly a half-day of my life...but in the midst of this bath of sour lemons, I did make some kick-a$$ lemonade! I took about 500 pictures yesterday and that was fun indeed. Captive, creative chaos all on digital media...the energy, the colors, the raw unadulterated joy was there, just all slightly less tolerable than ever before. So, these memories might have to keep me for a long time to come...